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Prioritize life and hummingbirds

Sometimes girls are not things that you sit on a shelf and watch

we are fragile strong fierce beings of light a balance of good and evil wrapped up in one.

We  all have experienced actuality and real life  events that have to take place in our  lives that have forever changed our outlook on the world and how it cares for us. 

We are a glorious gift to our mates and families .

We set  goals they  are stars that we  put up in the sky and hope to manifest later.

when they come to a fruition nothing but blessings fall because we  planted those seeds of greatness before and now it’s manifested right in front of your eyes in the raw

we get to live Our  dreams We get to do everything we get to be the best version of ourselves at all times

we can have fun and encourage other people to do the same

it’s not about coming out of our shell or it’s not about blossoming

it’s about  Women evolving and changing because we’ve already done those things at other stages Men  just have to tap into it.

Where’s my promise

You broke a promise you have yet to face me about that broken promise you promised that you would not show me your devil and that’s the first thing you did you promised that you would not hurt me and betray me that’s the second thing you did you promised me that you wouldn’t be toxic that’s all you did what am I supposed to do now I am traumatized completely by your broken promise I told you you were going to regret this I warned you about tampering with my heart you stole from me you kidnapped me you punished me you showed me you never really loved me anyway there’s no reason to hold on you promised and you broke it that’s like a bridge that has been burnt unable to be repaired the only thing that is left for us to do is to walk away please do your best by leaving me alone I do not need that energy in my life I am not insecure about who I am I am not insecure about what I am I am not insecure about where I am going because all these things I know I am stronger within myself without you it does not have to do with happiness it has to do with my peace of mind and that is what is best for me I know where my promise is it is hidden amongst the heavens where it belongs without you touching it you do not have God’s favor upon you anymore therefore I should not look in your direction I will not be coming towards you I will not be embracing you I will not acknowledge you for you have been replaced you are part of the past no longer to be remembered in my future you are not part of my present life therefore you are erased

Future :: The time to come , will be , going to , shall

I will go home tomorrow and frolic…

Hey Apple of my eye:: your someone who’s is greatly loved.. At the drop of a hat / immediately expect something unexpected and surprising:: Bolt from the 💙 :: I believe the time has come to bury the hatchet and settle this 1000 yr argument…

I’m not here trying to butter you up:: I don’t need to flatter someone to get what I want…I know that you have butterflies in your stomach:: I know you feel nervous around me. I feel the same way about you.

Our relationship is hanging on by the skin of your teeth:: just barely.

Lately you have been climbing the walls, restless and frustrated. You have cold feet:: why create fear that isn’t there?

You’ve been cool as a cucumber very calm in public eye. I know your dates/options will come a dime a dozen.but it only makes you feel down in the dumps depressed and sad I’m more down to earth so I get you… I’m sensible practical and realistic. I’m not asking much of you :: only a drop in the bucket you know something small.

Right now your eating your words :: taking back what you said you won’t have egg on your face love no need to feel embarrassed for something foolish :: especially if your not a fool phule phool…smooches…I know your music requires a lot of elbow grease and at the eleventh hour you will face the music but not without your feather in your cap:: A great achievement/ honor…

I know you will fight tooth and nail fa me as I would you… I also know you out of your comfort zone makes you feel like a fish out of water :: I know that I’m a fly in the ointment but I never fly off the handle ..I know that once in a while you get a kick out of something…I also know that once you get forty winks your good. You like to know from soup to nuts you hate to get under people’s skin I have the gift to gab:: sometimes I go bananas:: I have a green thumb and I know how to handle your heart with kid gloves …

Some moments I’m a hard nit to crack I don’t like my heads in the clouds not my fortay I suggest you hit da booms before hitting da hay

Together we hit the jackpot but you keep telling me to hold my horses and it keeps you in hot water.. you don’t want to jump the gun.. keep a stiff upper lip keep your shirt on your not going to lose me AND YOUR NOT GOING TO STRING ME ALONG EITHER

I don’t want you to Lay an egg ever I will always lend an ear they are definitely long enough…lol we are really like two peas in a pod:: I don’t want you to lose your shirt that will make you mad as a wet hen I don’t make waves unless necessary AND I CHARGE 75K TO BACK OFF !!!

As long as you mind your Ps and QS then mums da word if not I’ll be a needle in da haystack and RT now that’s not an option NO DICE I’m nuttier than a fruitcake if provoked IM NO OLD HAT

Ya heard with you I could be on cloud nine On DA Double you have the capability of making ME feel on top of the world…Don’t open a can of worms ok I’ll be out like a light …I WONT PASS THE HAT AND NEITHER WILL THE PEOPLE IN MY CIRCLE …Every step I take is a piece of cake .. I play with fire I KNOW LOL

I don’t want to ever pour oil on troubled waters… SO PU YOURSELF TOGETHER BE QUICK ON DA DRAW make it RAIN CATS AND DOGS

Do that and it will be our RED LETTER DAY. RING A.BELL we are just beginning to scratch the surface.. I need a my inventory to see like hot cakes got grandkids to take care of…

So SHAKE A LEG SKATE ON THIN ICE OR

Throw in da towel and tighten yo belt!!!

I’d rather be tickled pink than spi the beans

I gotta saw logs nightshift/night watch

Prosperity and blessings

Beauty

https://anchor.fm/sidehoediaries2020/episodes/Reward-yourself-you-earned-it-e1kpbp2

Another Man’s arms

Why is it I have to go and be caressed in another man’s arms and feel his kisses on my cheek my arms my body feeling empty inside lack of love real love having withdrawals from real touch sensual intimacy why do I have to go into another man’s arms to be held close to fill his warmth smell his cologne feel his breath on the back of my neck as we sleep that’s loneliness… Not being able to be loved or desired or yearned for by the one you truly love always available and ready in them arms reach of another woman but never the right one.. i can always put a smile on the strangers face and make them feel like they’re the only one that is loved by me in the world yet I’m all alone sleep by myself and I have no one to reassure me that everything is going to be okay no matter how much love I give for my heart and pour out into the world I barely have enough for myself  at the end of the day and I always return to empty room I always have to be wrapped in another man’s arms when am I going to be good enough to be in yours how long will it be before I feel your kisses on my arms your breath on the back of my neck as we sleep you holding me close nothing hurts more than another man’s touch especially when it’s not my own…. How long am I going to flat line before my heart skips a beat in love am I ever going to notice to look at a man I know that he’s mine or do I have to keep sharing

Our #Future Foundation

Good morning my joy I really just want to get this off of my chest so that you can understand exactly where I’m coming from so that you know how I truly feel firstly love you continue with the negative thoughts and the negative energy about me rejecting you and we will never get together because of your negative thinking secondly the foundation that we had built first was broken so we have to rebuild and start over the only way that’s going to happen love is if you stop thinking negatively and stop hoping and wishing and saying to yourself what if she rejects me I’ve never rejected you I’ve never doubted you for not one second in my mind I only refuted the negative energy that came from you that’s what you have to understand about me I have been in your corner this whole entire time we have been married for over 20 years and you have yet to apologize to me face to face for the things that you did once you apologize you’re forgiven immediately and we can move forward but until you stop thinking negative about our relationship our marriage our foundation it’s not going to be whole it’s not going to be positive it’s the thoughts that you’re putting in and the energy that you’re putting in that is keeping us separated it’s not me you did those things we both know that I forgave you for those things we both know that if I didn’t love you and didn’t want to be with you and wasn’t trying to mend our relationship and start fresh I would not even give you a second thought I’m going to need you to kill that negative energy within yourself about us so that we can be together until you do that we’re separated with love beauty